2019 Resolutions and Reading!

IMG_20181220_174159Happy New Year! I hope you all were able to celebrate in a way that made you feel happy and optimistic, and I hope you have your first book of 2019 all picked out! I don’t know about you, but I’m spending the day on the couch reading FOR SURE. I’m looking forward to 2019 for many reasons. First and most important, I’m getting married! But I’m also looking forward to a new year of reading and general self-improvement (ha).

For the past six months, and for the next six months going forward, I will be very focused on planning my wedding. It’s only going to get more intense, so with that in mind I am trying to be extra kind to myself. I’m not going to set any major goals or push myself too hard, unless it’s about getting this damn wedding planned and executed in a semi-successful manner. Of course I’m going to continue to work on taking better care of myself in all ways, increase my exercise, decrease my shitty food intake, get more sleep, etcetc, but I’m not going to beat myself up about it.

In reading, I’ve decided to have a year of “free reading”. I’ve set a Goodreads goal of ten books, which we all know is nonsense for me. I’ll be reading well over that, but I don’t want to worry about making my goal or stressing over how much time I have to read. I’ve had multiple friends talk to me about how frustrating they find the weird social media pressures that Goodreads can put on you as a reader, so I’ve also started using Bookriot’s Book Tracking Spreadsheet to keep stats on my reading in a way that is very nerdy and pleasing to my librarian heart and brain!

I read 80 books in 2018, the most I’ve ever read in a year! But I anticipate that my reading time will go down for a while as I try to work on wedding centerpieces and chasing guests down for RSVPs. But I don’t want to just NOT set a goal. I enjoy logging my books in Goodreads and seeing them listed together in the yearly reading challenge, so I figured I would just set a dummy goal.

Another thing I’ve done is retire from all book clubs but one. This will eliminate a good amount of scheduled reading that I always seem to have to push through. The biggest change I will need to make is NOT putting books on hold at my library unless I’m planning on reading them right away. Library books, while better than buying a ton of books that just pile up, tend to set another kind of reading schedule in my mind. I feel like I need to read all my library books in the order they’re due back, not the order I WANT to read them in, and that stresses me out. This is all nonsense, but it bugs me just the same.

I currently have 57-ish books checked out and like 13 holds. A bunch of those holds are not ready for me to pick up. They’re all hot buzzy books with long wait lists. How will I read them all before they’re due?? And any book I was hoping to read next is now immediately bumped because I NEED to read N.K. Jemisin’s How Long ’til Black Future Month RIGHT FRICKEN NOW because there is no way I’ll be able to renew. So that copy of Children of Blood and Bone by Tomi Adeyemi that I borrowed from my coworker months ago will still be sitting on my bedside table, untouched.

See how this creates an issue? So, no more library holds unless I intend to read it as soon as it gets in. And only one or two holds at a time. I need to keep my reading schedule loose and open so I can embrace more spontaneous reading!

I have so many beautiful, exciting, fun books on my shelves at home. I’m desperate to read them, but because I own them I always push them aside in favor of the library or book club books. In 2019, I’m really hoping that I will have more moments where I finish a book, set it down, and don’t have the next book picked out already. I’d love to finish a book and then browse my own bookshelves to find a book to read based on how I’m feeling in that moment, not what I wanted to read two weeks ago. Let’s see if I can accomplish this.

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Love @dasharezone too much.

And with all this in mind, my only true goal in 2019 (other than accomplishing the act of getting married) is to get to a point where I don’t order anything from Amazon anymore. I want to cut my dependence on the website and shop, instead, more locally. The ultimate goal is that next year’s Christmas gifts for my family will be 100% bought NOT on Amazon. I have the whole year to practice and get ready for the test haha. While I don’t really use Amazon for books all that much anymore, I’d like to make it a habit to visit a different local book store here in Pittsburgh once a month. It would be a nice opportunity to spend time and money in different parts of the city, see what cool stuff is out there, grab that buzzy new book I’ve been drooling over, and see some adorable book stores I haven’t been able to visit yet!

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Local book stores have the best sections. This is at The Big Idea in Bloomfield, Pittsburgh PA

Life has been really hard lately, and the anxiety and stress from the news and the outside world has had the same effect on me as probably most people: I’m extra tired, I’m extra grumpy, and I’m extra overwhelmed. While I try my best to do my part–contact my elected officials, support local and national groups, volunteer–I’m only one person. What all of this has really pushed me to do is take care of myself. I hadn’t been to a general practitioner in 13 years until 2018. I also just went to the dentist for the first time in 8 years. I saw a therapist for the first time in 8 years. And I treated myself to a full read/reread of Harry Potter! But, embarrassingly, this is just the beginning. I have many more medical appointments to make, little life upkeep things that need to be done. I desperately need my passport and a new prescription for my glasses. There’s just, shit to do. I’m really looking forward to 2019 as a year where I can maybe get a handle on it. As someone who has spent a lot of time putting my energy outward into activities and other people, this almost feels selfish. I feel bad spending my money and time on my health, which is weird. It’s something I’m working on, but it still gets to me. 2018 was a year of what felt like a lot of little steps backwards and away from things. For the first time in a while I didn’t feel like I actually accomplished anything. Here’s to 2019 being a building year!

What about you? What are your reading and life goals for the year to come? It’s cool if the answer is “nothing” because for some of us, that’s a goal in and of itself.

No New Books, 2018!

fd8f06c5ecf895caced1fd4f6398163b--funny-reading-quotes-quotes-about-reading-booksSo, like many of my book lovers and librarians before me, I have fallen into a crisis situation concerning the number of books I have in my apartment and on my tbr list. My To Read list on Goodreads is over 2,300 at the time of this post, the number of books I have checked out from the library is currently about 60 (down from 87), I have hundreds of books in my apartment currently (but that’s hardly the total number I own…I have them stashed everywhere), and I buy at least two new books a month for my book clubs, not to mention my impulse emotional book buying (which I’ve been doing a lot of post-wedding dress shopping). This needs to stop. I can’t fit these books in my space anymore, and what is worse, I can’t read them all. Most of the books I own I haven’t read. So that is why I am going to take a bold step for 2018: I won’t be buying or checking out any new books to the best of my ability. Sure, I’ll have slip-ups, and for my one book club I’ll still be buying the book because sales are donated to Planned Parenthood, but this new rule will at least keep me in check.

So what does this mean? It means that I will actually be reading books I own! And then perhaps I’ll be able to get rid of a few of them. I’m sure I’ll really hate a couple…can’t love them all. So for Shameful Book Club I will only be selecting books I own, which adds another layer to my shame because I took the step of actually buying these books and yet still haven’t read them. For most of my other book clubs, I’ll have to just let go. This is going to be insanely difficult for me, because I’m a book club enthusiast and belong to five currently. I’m constantly looking to join more. But if they don’t read a book I own, I won’t be able to participate.

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My bedroom.

While I’m going to hate this, I know it’s the right move. It will free up so much of my reading time and give me actual choice over what I’m picking up. My reading is so dictated by book clubs and library due dates that I hardly ever get to read spontaneously or catch up on personal reading. This is partly why I haven’t read most of the books I own. About 37% of the books I read last year were books I had to read for book clubs alone. That doesn’t include books for work or projects.

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Shelves and boxes of books I own and a crate of library books in my office.

This also means I won’t be checking out books from the library. Since I work at a library and find it emotionally satisfying to check out arm fulls of books at a time, this will also be a challenge. Again, I’m sure there will be a slip-up here and there, but hopefully I won’t have more than two library books checked out at a time. My plan is to read as many of my currently checked out books as I can, and as I return them I won’t be replacing them. It’s hard for me to resist impulse check-outs, especially because I read so many book blogs and lists. I’m always snatching up the new best seller or forgotten classic that industry folks recommend. But if I’m doing that, I’m not reading my own books, and I’m filling up my living space with more piles.

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Some of my library books.

What do I hope to achieve? A better understanding of my own collection, for one. I have such a random selection of books, and I’d like to see what it all feels like and looks like in terms of representing who I am as a person. I’ve been reading a lot about the art of book collecting and how crafting a personal collection is different from amassing a personal library. I will still have a library, but it would be fun to identify and build off of budding collections in my existing library.

I’d also LOVE an opportunity to weed my own library, but my anxiety and book obsession will not allow me to ditch books I haven’t read. I want to read them, assess them, and then either keep or dispose of them in some way. This ties back into the overall vibe of my personal collection and how I want to curate it. I know that seems a bit odd to think about curating your own books, but to me it seems like an interesting project and a cool way to express myself. Freeing up shelf space would also be amazing. Our apartment, while bigger than our last, lacks a bit on storage. Having shelves for things other than books would help with that. If I’m able to get all of my library books returned, that will free up an entire bookshelf. AN ENTIRE BOOKSHELF!!!

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My “orderly” shelf.

Another interesting idea that I read about was buying books with specific reasoning in mind. I recently saw an article written by a young poet who discussed how she rarely buys books, but when she does it means a lot to her. She proceeded to go through and list every book she bought in 2016 and why exactly she bought that book. I know I won’t be perfect in 2018 when it comes to #nonewbooks, but if I approach it with this idea in mind, I will be working on good habits and have a really interesting collection to talk about at the end of the year.

What about you and your book buying habits? Want to join me on this foolhardy journey?